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20 QUESTIONS AND LESSONS WE CAN ALL LEARN FROM SEX AND THE CITY

When it comes to love, no one has asked more questions in television history than Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City.
20 Questions and Lesson We Can All Learn From Sex and The City

 

When it comes to love, no one has asked more questions in television history than Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City. While her search for love may have been a lengthy journey, she’s asked some pertinent questions about relationships that we’ve all wondered about at some point in our life.  Let’s indulge.

Carrie Question 1: When it comes to love, if we know the house always wins, why gamble?

Lesson: Carrie learned to hit the jackpot in the future, you might have to bet on where you are in the present.

Carrie Question 2: When it comes to relationships, is it smarter to follow your heart or your head?

Lesson: Carrie learned that you can lose your head in love. Logic doesn’t trump what’s in your heart. We’ve all learned through Carrie (over and over and over again). We hear you Carrie: the heart wants what the heart wants.

Carrie Question 3: Isn’t part of the breaking up process that you get free rein to whine to your friends?

Lesson: Your friends will be there for you no matter what but relationship roller coasters where your friends are dragged along is never fun. Not following through on cutting out a guy who is clearly no good for you can also get annoying and earn you a one-way ticket to a therapist’s office like Carrie.

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Carrie Question 4: Twenty-something girls: friend….or foe?

Lesson: She realizes that twenty something girls are just fabulous until you see one with the man who broke your heart. (Romanticizing the good things about being in your twenties and compare yourself to others? It’s a slippery slope and we all know it.)

Carrie Question 5: Are New Yorkers evolving past relationships?

Lesson: She realizes that sometimes it takes baby steps to get to your destination. (The Carrie of today might want to consider Twitter, online dating, video dating and Tinder. We’re certainly not evolving past relationships but how we go about it sure has.)

Carrie Question 6: Can you change a man?

Lesson: She realizes maybe you can’t change a man but once in awhile you can change a woman. (Really, if women can change so can men. Last I checked we’re still the same species.)

Carrie Question 7: Are men just women with balls?

Lesson: She realizes that maybe men and women don’t live in the same zip code, but we’re moving closer.

Carrie Question 8: Is there such a thing as relationship karma?

Lesson: She realizes the universe may not always play fair, but at least it’s got a hell of a sense of humor.

Carrie Question 9: Is it better to fake it than be alone?

Lesson: She faces her fear by going solo for lunch. No faking.

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Carrie Question 9: What are the break-up rules?

Lesson: Carrie learns that no matter who broke your heart or how long it takes to heal, you’ll never get through it without your friends. (There’s nothing like a girls night and a good cry to mend a broken heart. Just saying.)

Carrie Question 10:  To be in a couple, do you have to put your single self on a shelf?

Lesson: Carrie learns the things about relationships: sometimes they look prettier from the outside and what’s on the inside can be different than it seems.

Carrie Question 11: Is a relationship a relationship without the zsa zsa zsu?

Lesson: When it comes to relationships, maybe we're all in glass houses and shouldn't throw stones. Because you can never really know. Some people are settling down. Some people are settling. And some people refuse to settle for anything less...than butterflies.

Carrie Question 12: Are we willing to believe anything to date?

Lesson: Carrie learned a valuable lesson from experience “From that night on, promiscuous women everywhere would tell the tale of the one-night stand that turned into a relationship”. (Anything can happen but ignorance can sometimes be bliss.)

Carrie Question 13: When did we stop being free to be you and me? (specifically, a right to shoes)

Lesson: The fact is. Sometimes it's hard to walk in a single woman's shoes.
That's why we need really special ones now and then to make the walk a little more fun. (we concur)

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Carrie Question 14: Can you make a mistake and miss your fate?

Lesson: Maybe our mistakes are what make our fate. Without them, what would shape our lives? Perhaps, if we never veered off course, we wouldn't fall in love, or have babies, or be who we are.

Carrie Question 15: Soul mates: reality or torture device?

Lesson: She realized, having three soul mates already nailed down made it a lot easier to spot those great nice guys to have fun with. (She’s talking her 3 best friends. Sometimes you have to look at what you have versus what you don’t. You may already have what you’re looking for.)

Carrie Question 16: Do we need distance to get close?

Lesson: When it comes to a trial, you have to listen to the evidence.
But when it comes to the trials of love, you have to listen to your heart.

Carrie Question 17: Do you have to play games to make a relationship work?

Lesson: Carrie realizes she tends to pick the wrong guy. (Case in point: Maybe you’re just attracted to men who play games.)

Carrie Question 18: Do we search for “lessons” to lessen the pain?

Lesson: It seems that men can get out of a relationship without even a goodbye. But apparently women, have to either get married or learn something. (If a lessen is what you can get out of a bad experience, so be it.)

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Carrie Question 19: When it comes to life and love, why do we believe our worst reviews?

Lesson: Carrie learned that at any given moment, someone, somewhere could be making a face about you. But it's the reviews you give yourself that matter.

Carrie Question 20: In matters of love, how do you know when it’s right?

Lesson: Carrie realizes that maybe there are no right moments, right guys, right answers. Maybe you just have to say what's in your heart.

Amy Yew is a registered clinical counselor and relationship therapist. Tell us what you think and submit any questions you have to amyvancouvercourier@gmail.com. You can also tweet your thoughts on Twitter @AmyYew.