A long-term relationship can take you to many places and even take you into new territories you never thought you would be. However, an all too frequent occurrence of lovers venturing out of the city to suburbia is on the rise. If all the love is moving out of the city, what are we left with?
As an ex suburban resident and newly conformed to my rightful place as a city girl, I’m knowledgeable on what each has to offer. Nights coming downtown meant letting your hair down and the possibility of igniting a steamy romance before heading back to the quiet life. It was a big deal and much thought was spent on where to go and what to wear. There was a sense of beautiful chaos that being part of the downtown experience offered.
The city is alive downtown. Meeting someone new is rarely avoidable. There is always something going on and hooking up is really a numbers game. Most people who live downtown also work downtown. We are all constantly on the go and relationships often fall to the wayside for a busy work schedule. Hooking up and pulling away has become a common M.O. If you combine all the aspects on what brings people to live downtown, getting into a long-term relationship isn’t always conducive to the lifestyle. The real estate prices for owning doesn’t exactly help either which means that a younger age group is moving downtown to rent instead of own.
As I begin to approach my 30s, fewer of my friends close to my age are single and those who are single are looking to pair up. Those who are ahead of the game have married and become parents. My friends who are couples have also been suggesting something I find a hard pill to swallow: moving to the suburbs. The great prices of real estate and fewer drunken 19-year-old girls puking on the side of the street may be a great lure to get out of the city but it also begs the question of what’s left?
Most people move downtown to meet more people but love is not what you will always find. Creating a long lasting relationship is more than a numbers game. You have to recognize the quality you seek in a partner and ensure that your expectations are reasonable. Having more options in the city also means you have to keep your eye on the ball and not be distracted.
If it looks like many people living downtown carry a heavy heart when it comes to relationships or love. People fall in love all the time in the city but those who remain in long-term relationships are likely to move. For now it looks like the city may not be for the faint hearted and just because you have more options doesn’t mean it’s easier to find love.
Amy Yew is a researcher and therapist. Tell us what you think and submit any questions you have to [email protected]. You can also tweet your thoughts on Twitter @AmyYew.
