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This election is for the birds

As I waited for the final count on the provincial election, I had cause to turn my attention to yet another round of voting in another election.
bird vote
Anna’s hummingbird (top right) received only 42 per cent of ballots cast in the city bird vote — nowhere near a clear majority. This has caused a bit of a flap.

As I waited for the final count on the provincial election, I had cause to turn my attention to yet another round of voting in another election. It was one that received less attention, perhaps, but one that was equally filled with contradictions and conspiracy theories. It was a ballot box battle that could cause as big a flap as the City of Vancouver’s disastrous first launch of their new logo.

I am referring to the competition to name the city’s official bird. Unlike in years past when the title was given for just 12 months, so that any misstep or embarrassment caused by the winner could soon be forgotten, this time the position was to be permanent, making the competition more fierce and subject to even more scrutiny.

Charges have been leveled about the secrecy of the selection process that resulted in choosing the four birds in the running. Oversight seems to have been scarcer than hen’s teeth.  

To refresh your memory: the four birds competing for the title were the Anna’s hummingbird, the northern flicker, the varied thrush and the spotted towhee.

When that list was recently read out by Rick Cluff, the host of CBC radio’s Early Edition, the astute weather and traffic reporter Amy Bell expressed a view many of you may share. “I haven’t heard of any of them. What about the crow?” Indeed. And, I might add, what about the beloved bushtit?

Who was this secret murmuration that made the selection?

They certainly seemed to have laid an egg.

That aside, I have, by the way, been assured by sources at 12th and Cambie that the title comes with no remuneration, although I suspect there may be city staff support provided the winner and a stipend offered for occasional tweets.

As you may know, the bird with the most votes was the Anna’s hummingbird. However, it received only 42 per cent of the ballots cast and therefore nowhere near a clear majority. The northern flicker received 32 per cent, the varied thrush 15 per cent and the spotted towhee 11 per cent. All of which has caused a bit of a flap.

There are allegations — as yet unproven in court — of big money playing a role in selecting the winning candidate. Consider that the most recent Birder’s Guide to Vancouver featured the Anna’s hummingbird on its cover.

Call me as crazy as a loon, but I’m forced to ask whether this was recorded as a campaign donation.

A spokesperson for the other three contestants, a Miss Avian S. Peacock, explained that clearly what the citizens of Vancouver were expressing in that vote was a desire that all the candidates work collaboratively and that no single bird species should hold the title.

Failing that, and realizing that the hummingbird has a well-deserved reputation as a bully, she said, the flicker, the thrush and the towhee are now negotiating a coalition deal among themselves, which they will present to council, that points out they received the majority of public support and are prepared to work together.

There is another point, although I hesitate to ruffle feathers by raising it. Just who is this Anna’s hummingbird capturing the populist sentiment sweeping the globe?

It is a recent immigrant to our fair city. Thirty years ago the authoritative publication Birds of Vancouver and the Lower Mainland made no mention of the Anna’s at all. Only the smaller rufous hummingbird took up residence here and only for a few months of the year at that.

Meanwhile, the Anna’s carries on as if it is the only cock of this particular walk.

Of all the four birds in this competition, only the Anna’s male refuses to help with child rearing. The other males split the duties and sometimes do more than their share.

So by choosing the Anna’s, what does that say in a city that prides itself over issues of equity and understands the value of child care?

Furthermore, the Anna’s male is a shameless philanderer. And don’t forget his anger management problems. He is on record as driving the mothers of his children away from feeding stations during their brief break while tending the young.

Let’s hope the city gets its ducks in a row before the chickens come home to roost on this one.

@allengarr