This Canucks vs Coyotes matchup was the Steve Carell of hockey games: It started slow, garnered very few infractions along the way, and ended up being a surprisingly entertaining spectacle.
The first half of the game was in Bruce Almighty territory. It was fine. Sven Baertschi scored a nice goal, but aside from that, not much happened. The net came off a few times. Goaltender Mike Smith got a Delay of Game penalty. For the first thirty minutes, it was just a good, fun, average, clean-cut game of hockey. It wasn’t until the third period that the Canucks really started picking up the pace and moving into full Anchorman mode.
So, if you’re the type of person who likes IWTG updates littered with weak Steve Carell references, keep on readin’, because I sat through The Incredible Burt Wonderstone and Dinner for Schmucks before I watched this game.
- As stated, the first period was fairly uneventful. The early Mike Smith penalty didn’t result in anything special from the ensuing Canucks’ power play. But about 10 minutes in, Baertschi did open up the scoring with a nice solo effort. Catching Kevin Connauton backpedaling, he intercepted the defender’s weak pass at the top of the circle and beat Smith glove side for the 1-0 opener. Some would say Connauton’s slip-up was despicable. Me, I would say that such an insult is going a little bit over the hedge.
- I’m so sorry for the way I am.
- The goal brought Baertschi even with Bo Horvat in team-leading goals, with 11. That lasted all of 35 minutes until Horvat retook the lead early in the third period. This goal surge from young forwards is exactly what the Canucks need, for there will be a day when the Sedins grow old and find themselves in hockey himmel. So it’s nice to see BaeBo picking up the slack.
- The second period brought a lot of scoring opportunities, but eventually ended up a bust as neither team was able to close. I’m paralleling the 40 Year-Old Virgin, of course, but don’t read too far into it. (FYI, the Canucks exploded near the end to seal the deal). The most entertaining part of this period for me was when broadcasters John Shorthouse and John Garrett couldn’t seem to stop talking about New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady. They discussed what he would look like wearing Oliver Ekman-Larsson’s brand of Swedish underwear, and even went as far as to mentioning their below-the-belt grooming habits. Like I said, the second period was a pent-up time for everybody…
- Mmmmmoving right along, let’s get to the third period and settle nicely back into our Carellian metaphors. The final 20 minutes was all The Office. Well, the good parts of The Office. Vancouver’s hard work was finally rewarded, as they dominated the competition and stole the show. Brandon Sutter was rewarded with a penalty shot after being hooked by both Luke Schenn and Ekman-Larsson on a breakaway. Number 20 had no trouble deking out Smith and beating the veteran goaltender with a top-shelf backhander.
- The Canucks put the nail in the coffin, however, when Bo Horvat did what Bo Horvat does best. Late in the period, he chased a loose puck into the offensive zone, leaving Connor Murphy et al in his dust. He faked Smith into biting on the forehand, then slammed on the brakes and tucked a nice little backhand home. After being undressed for the third time, I think it’s safe to say that Mike Smith will go back to the bus reflecting unhappily on his terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.
- Nikita Tryamkin just gets better and better. Early in the season we were happy with the occasional poke check with his long reach or getting the puck out of the defensive zone without icing it. Now he’s making end-to-end rushes or pretty little passes off the boards. I feel prouder than Jon Stewart watching Steve Carell go from Produce Pete to leading man.
- Ryan Miller made 22 saves for the first Canucks shutout of the season and the first one since October 13, 2015. It’s been a while. I honestly don’t remember any of his saves. It was the least memorable performance since Steve Carell on The Dana Carvey Show. Was he any good? I have no idea! No one ever watched that show!
- BONUS FUN FACT: Check out this interview where Steve Carell admits that he once considered a career in pro hockey!
