Rachel McHollister has suffered from anorexia since she was 14 years old. Now an owner of a boutique public relations firm, she first started restricting what she ate. As she got older, she binged and purged. She’s been fighting the disease for 13 years and continues to wage war against it on a daily basis.

McHollister recently participated in a UBC panel discussion on body image and related issues such as self-esteem, social pressure, and media messages that can contribute to eating disorders to raise awareness of the issue.

According to the Delta resident, there were quite a few factors that led to her eating condition. “I was never told I was pretty. At dance recitals, I was never told I did a good job,” she said. “My mom would tell me that my hands needed to be straighter or I needed to smile more.” McHollister was also bullied at school. Boys would constantly tease her based on her appearance. She also learned a lot watching her mother eat and not eat certain foods.

McHollister doesn’t blame the media for spreading certain ideals around body image. “That’s an easy out,” says the Langara College journalism grad. “It’s our choice to read and look at what we want. We can’t blame any one thing.”

There is our own behaviour, she points out. “When someone looses weight they are generally praised. When someone gains a few pounds, it’s looked upon negatively and usually discussed behind their back.”

Kids need good role models, she says. “We have to teach children to respect themselves and their bodies. Sit down and eat with your children. Don’t talk about how much you ate or how you hate your thighs.”

At the age of 19, McHollister finally acknowledged she had a problem. She sought help and was admitted to St. Paul’s Hospital eating disorder program. She has attended various treatment programs since then, but says there aren't enough options in the province, especially for people of her age.

“I wish there was the same amount of funding for people with eating disorders as there is for people with an addiction to drugs or alcohol. All three are a means of coping with some sort of traumatic situation,” she says.

About to seek further treatment at The Woodstone Residence, Canada’s first publicly funded residential treatment facility on Galiano Island, McHollister hopes the specialized one-on-one treatment will help her on her road to recovery. “I have been trying not to let it overcome me and my career but in the end it has really taken a toll on my body,” she admits.

McHollister hopes by speaking out (National Eating Disorders Awareness Week is Feb. 5 to11), she is breaking the silence around eating disorders and impressionable girls and boys will have a healthier understanding of their bodies and body image. She’ll be participating in a yoga benefit at Heritage Hall Feb. 8th to benefit ProjectTrue.com, a new online support and healing resource site for disordered eating. On Feb. 10th, singer Sarah McLachlan will headline the eighth annual Looking Glass Foundation Gala at the Rocky Mountaineer Station. The dinner and auction will benefit The Woodstone treatment centre on Galiano Island. www.lookingglassbc.com

Biggest challenge?

Fighting the battle in my head everyday: Do I eat today, will I binge/purge today, how will I get through the day, should I just stay in bed all day, and if I decide I want to eat, what should I have?

Biggest wish?

I wish that I never had this eating disorder and I was able to live a normal, healthy life; that I had the self-esteem and courage to stick up to my mother and tell her I wanted her to call me pretty and to tell those bullies to f**k off!

What does success look like?

Being happy with my life - not worrying about what I’m eating or how much I had that day. Having a career that I love and working with people who treat me well and believe in me. Continue to have a relationship with my brother and parents and an even stronger one with my boyfriend. Best life lesson you’ve learned?

There are many: Moving across Canada doesn’t magically solve your problems. You have to be strong, even when you are weak. You are the only person that knows what you are thinking and can change it. Have confidence and say what you are thinking.

One lesson you’d love to give others?

If you think someone has an eating disorder, all you can be is supportive. You can’t tell someone to do something they aren’t ready to do. Provide them with options, show them you love them and when they aren’t strong enough be an advocate for them.

One thing you could change about the world?

The way food and health is portrayed. I recently took a trip to China and I was mesmerized at how food is treated there. There were no calorie boards up everywhere and people aren’t constantly obsessing about what they eat. It was there that I realized how much North American culture is so focused on food. I would change the way everything is portrayed about food and health.

One thing you hate most about the world?

Our government and how they treat eating disorders. If I were to have cancer I would have received treatment much faster. An eating disorder can be seen like a type of cancer as it tears your body apart, slowly you acquire more ailments and then your body gives out. The government doesn’t take eating disorders seriously and we need to because people are dying for reasons that can be prevented.

In an industry that is obsessed with body image, why did you choose a career in fashion?

People look at fashion in very different ways. I look at it as a form of art. I went to a Fine Arts school. I have a passion for seeing how people express themselves and fashion is just another form of that.

Are those standards—the way models look—changing in the industry?

It all depends on the designer really, the UK is making larger strides then perhaps North America as Vogue UK featured their first plus size model on the cover several months back. In Vancouver, there are a few designers who are taking large strides in creating pieces for everyone.

One thing you wish Vancouverites would stop whining about?

I’m totally a whiner when it comes to the rain so I would have to say the weather.

Biggest accomplishment?

Getting my diploma in journalism.

Biggest failure? Probably not recognizing I had a problem and that there is more to life than calories and food. Getting help sooner or at least wanting to get help sooner.

Favourite charity?

Whenever I hear of a charity or foundation that helps men and women with eating disorders I fully support them in any way possible.

A talent you possess that many are not aware of?

It’s been many years but I can still tap my heart out.

Last $20 bucks to your name, how would you spend it?

I like to call myself a frugal fashionista so I would probably hit up the thrift store to see if I could find any amazing pieces or go online to find an amazing pair of shoes.

Best bar/lounge?

I’m not really a bar or lounge type of person. However, I have been meaning to check out House Guest in Gastown. I heard they have a pretty amazing Golden Skull wall.

Favourite restaurant? You are asking someone who has an eating disorder; someone who loathes going out to restaurants. I don’t have a specific restaurant. As long as the server can take my long list of modifications and come back with everything that I asked for, then I’m good.

Your biggest indulgence?

Shoes and purses.

Last book read?

A Place of Yes by Bethenny Frankel

Favourite designer

Alexander McQueen - the most amazing man ever! I must say my wardrobe will never be complete until I have the Lobster Claw Armadillo Shoes.

All-time favourite movie?

Fame

Favourite date place Walking along the seawall in the SUN and warm weather!

Favourite retail store?

I love my thrift stores because you never know what you may find.

Best thing about this city

It’s really outdoorsy. My boyfriend has been getting me into hiking. I’ve done the Grouse Grind about five times…in less than 45 minutes I might add.

Worst thing about this city

The weather network is always wrong! When I was in Toronto I was always amazed, they would say that it would start snowing at 2:30 p.m. and it literally would start snowing at 2:30 p.m.

Your favourite neighbourhood? Gastown—it’s definitely where I feel the most at home. There are many hidden gems in and around the neighbourhood.

What is a perfect day in Vancouver?

Sign on an amazing new client for my PR firm and write a stellar press release. Then I would take my bike out for a little ride, with my dog chillin’ in the front basket, and my favourite tunes playing in my ear buds. Afterwards, I’d meet up with friends, go window-shopping on Robson Street, catch up and share some laughs.

The one place you take out-of-town visitors to show off our city

Queensborough Landing for some good old-fashioned outlet mall shopping and Lynn Canyon Park and Suspension Bridge.

Who inspires you?

I don’t get my inspiration from one single person. Passion inspires me. When I see passion in a person I’m interviewing, they inspire me. I find everyone has a story and usually an interesting one. That was why I love journalism.

Who bugs you? Women who have eating disorders and complain about the lack of help in Vancouver but they only do it because it gives them something to do, they don’t actually want to get better. There, I said it.

Local person you admire most?

Dr. Birmingham, professor of psychiatry and former medical director of St. Paul's Hospital eating disorder program. He has an immense knowledge of eating disorders and is one of a few who have helped me survive this horrible disease.

Most overrated person?

With the exception of Barbara Walters, everyone on The View.

Most memorable celebrity encounter

Last year, Joshua Jackson was on my flight back from L.A. I religiously watched Dawson’s Creek.

If you could be any celebrity

Lady Gaga. She can get away with wearing whatever she wants, designers make her custom clothing and she is a huge advocate of many causes she holds near and dear to her heart. And, she’s just pretty fabulous.

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