The LGBTQ+ community in Vancouver can be fun, inviting and welcoming; but for some, finding their place within it is an ongoing challenge.
Queers and Beers, a seasonal event that takes place at the Boxcar and Cobalt parking lot, is one way for people to make new friends in a friendly environment.
Ryn Broz organized the event shortly after moving to Vancouver from Winnipeg as a way for people to hang out in a space that isn’t based around dancing or drag – although the afterparty is Man Up’s Amateur Hour at the Cobalt.
“It really is an event that’s centred around hanging out with your friends, meeting new people and having that sort of bar space that seems to be not so prevalent anymore,” Broz says. “We get a really mixed group of people, especially in ages.”
One of the interesting things about Queers and Beers is that it’s an event based around talking, hanging out and the idea that the people in attendance arethe event.
“I talk to more strangers at Q&B than I do at other events, and not just because I’m the organizer, that’s what a lot of people there do,” Broz says.
When Broz came from Winnipeg, she was a little bit overwhelmed by the different culture, parties, and the “coolness” of Vancouverites.
“In the city in general, it can be hard to make friends, and when you’re queer then you sort of have another layer of not necessarily relating to everyone, or having your friend group be a bit smaller. It sort of narrows you down a little bit and I think there could also be a slight nervousness,” she says.
Broz thinks that overall, the LGBTQ+ community is welcoming, but that there should be more spaces interested in hosting a wide variety of queer identities.
Luna Sibley, 19, has struggled as a pansexual woman to find her place in the community. She believes that people, specifically in her age group, need to be more open to all sexual identities.
“For me and others, it felt like no one took my sexuality seriously. It’s so tough for someone to come out and to accept themselves. To be put down like that by a community that looks so inviting and so welcoming is heartbreaking,” she says.
As a minor, Sibley gave up on trying to find her place amongst other LGBTQ+ people. But now that she is able to go to clubs and parties, she looks forward to trying again.
“Be patient. If things don’t work out the first time, don’t give up like I did,” she advises. “I missed out on a lot of great parties and a lot of great people because I was so scared.”
Sibley says that you have to do your research, and find events that you want to go to, and that it’s important to find someone who really accepts you and wants to get you involved.
“Focus on that person and get yourself out there. It’s really difficult to find a place in the community, so once you find it, don’t lose it.”
Broz’s advice to people looking to make friends is similar.
“I would say, if you have the time and you have the energy, sign up for a wide wash of things and see what sticks,” she says.
“Don’t get discouraged. If you go out and you try a thing, and you don’t feel like you’re relating to anyone, try something else. There are enough neat things happening in the city that if you’re willing to put yourself out there, you’ll meet people.”
Broz adds that everyone fears they don’t belong, or people don’t want to hang out with them, but most people want to make friends.
“Most of the people who I labelled in the community as being intimidating or popular were actually super nice once I talked to them. Don’t be afraid to talk to people and ask for someone’s phone number or follow up.”
The Friend Zone
Here are some upcoming events to check out with your friends, or where you can make some new ones:
• Babes on Babes/Queer Long Weekend Jam is back on July 2 at Fortune Soundclub. Go for the dance party, stay for the cool DJs.
• Registration for Double Rainbow Dodgeball, a queer dodgeball league recommended by Broz, is now accepting registration applications for the 2017-18 season.
• And stay tuned for all of the Pride events kicking off in late July, including Queers and Beers on July 30! We’ll keep you posted here.
• The Pink Pages are a monthly LGBTQ+ forum, brought to you by members of the LOUD Business Network. Have an LGBTQ+ event or story idea for the Pink Pages? Email [email protected]
