News that Rachel Notley’s Alberta government had launched a trade war against B.C.’s wine industry had our tannins a quiver yesterday. And not just because our tannins are easily quivered.
On Tuesday, Notley announced that Alberta would ban the import of wines from its neighbour to the west in retaliation of B.C. imposing regulations on the Trans Mountain pipeline expansion between Edmonton to Burnaby.
Yes, it was an oil and wine smack down, resulting in what we hoped would be some exceptionally creative headlines from our media friends. Sadly, like a zinfandel grape shrivelled on the vine, few media outlets produced the full-bodied, richly bouqueted, playful-on-the-mouth headlines we had hoped for.
A couple media outlets did their best. Postmedia should get props for its “B.C. wineries see red as Alberta declares war in pipeline dispute.” Same goes for CBC’s “Sour grapes: Albertans react to boycott of B.C. wines.”
And Metro reporter Jen. St. Denis sagely turned to Twitter for its opinion.
What headline should I use today
— Jen St. Denis (@JenStDen) February 6, 2018
But just about everywhere else we looked, writers took a humdrum, chardonnay-like approach to their wine headlines. Which is a shame. Here’s a few we’d like to offer up to our media brethren, free of charge.
- Grapes of wrath
- Notley in my backyard
- Wine of the times
- Que syrah, syrah, whatever will be will be
- Merlot blow
- Bordeaux guard
- New day Riesling
- Alberta government is being un-riesling-able
You’re welcome.
