We'd like to share our opinion about opinions

Kudos and Kvetches

Last week the Vancouver Art Gallery released its much-jawed-about concept for a new building. It was bold, it was tall, it was wooden. And, not surprisingly, it triggered a torrential downpour of comments on social media. Everyone from pimply teenagers to bored house husbands to people whose jobs allow them to surf Facebook at all hours of the workday felt the need to voice their opinion on the concept’s design, whether they knew anything about architecture or not.

Personally, we think the proposed new art gallery looks kind of cool. But we also thought that about the band Bootsauce from 1990 to 1992.

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That said, in the spirit of the free-flowing public opinion that has been unleashed on the art gallery, we’d like to offer up our own ill-informed opinions on a range of topics that we have no business having an opinion about.

Thomas Mulcair’s beard
It’s obviously being used to obscure a chubby neck, but we’ll tolerate it.

Ultimate Frisbee
It’s technically a sport, but the awarding of spirit points to your competitors is lame.


Balsamic Vinegar

Kill them all.

The band Of Monsters and Men and their ilk
Perhaps the most annoying sound to hear in a supermarket besides a crying baby with diarrhea.

Women wearing those floppy felt hats
We want to like it, but it doesn’t feel right. What’s next, shawls?

Dudes with man buns
Unfortunate, but not entirely surprising.

Our belly

The word “belly”
It sounds a lot cuter and less harsh than “gut,” which is why we use it.

Cyndi Lauper’s hit song “She Bop”
It’s about masturbation. Seriously. Read the lyrics.

Baby Showers
Totally sexist.

Hacky sack

The saying “on fleek”
We haven’t googled it yet. But until we hear one of our parents or Christy Clark use it, we’ll give it the thumbs up.

Best meal of the day.

Salt and Vinegar Potato Chips
Stinky and vomit-inducing. What is the matter with you people?

Earth Wind and Fire’s “September”
Likely the greatest song we’ve ever heard with Billy Joel’s epic “Scenes from an Italian Restaurant” coming in a close second.

Lawn Darts
Bring the ones with the “dangerous” metal tips back and stop being such a nanny state.

Palestine and Israel
Ah….. never mind.


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