Weddings these days are not cheap affairs. According to weddingbells.ca’s survey of 2309 Canadians, the average cost of weddings is around $22,429. There is also a considerable amount of time and effort that couples put into seat planning, invites and much more. If you’re ever in the predicament of “no shows” for your wedding, what should you do? Most people take the high road and move past the cost they had to incur but not this couple who made headlines by billing their guest for no showing at their wedding.
Jessica Baker received an usual bill in the mail from their friend after missing their wedding. Baker and her husband said that they had to back out of going to the wedding because their babysitter cancelled on them last minute and the couple chose to have a child free wedding. Enclosed in the bill was a message from the couple that stated: “This cost reflects the amount paid by the bride and groom for meals that were RSVPed for, reimbursement and explanation for no show, card, call or text would be appreciated.” The bill was for two herb-crusted walleye dishes (tax and service charge included) for a grand total of $75.90 USD.
When the story made headlines, people had plenty to say about this situation. Most people felt that this move by the couple was disgusting and definitely ruined a friendship.
However, consider the couples point of view: There was a lot of time, effort and money spent on the wedding to celebrate with loved ones. Not only did their friend no show (which I suspect isn’t the main reason for their decision to bill their friend), she didn’t call, text, send a card or a gift. The lack of followup was probably the deciding factor to send the bill. For the couple, taking the high road didn’t feel so good and they did something about it. While most of us will/have just sucked up the cost of wedding no shows, this couple chose to really make a statement of displeasure by billing their friend.
Even though many of us have things going on in our lives, we have to keep in mind that basic etiquette still has to be present (call or text if you can’t make it) especially if they’re a good friend of yours and the relationship is important. This clearly isn’t about the money but rather hurt feelings. While billing someone for a no show at a wedding isn’t socially acceptable (yet), we still have to show up for our friends even if it’s in a text. After all, that’s what friendship is about.
What do you think? Would you pay the bill if you were in a similar circumstance?
Source: The Globe and Mail “This couple billed their no show wedding guest” published on October 2, 2015.
Amy Yew is a registered clinical counselor and relationship therapist. She is also the author of a fashion and lifestyle blog Style Du Jour. Tell us what you think and submit any questions you have to [email protected].
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