What exactly is going on with Ben Hutton and Markus Granlund’s finger bump?

And is it to blame for the Canucks’ struggles?

Pass it to Bulis

The Canucks suffered their worst loss of the season last Tuesday, falling to the New York Rangers 7-2. It was an utter debacle, made worse by the fact that the Canucks largely outplayed the Rangers in the first period. Seeing the Canucks get blown out after starting the game so well was completely demoralizing.

Imagine my relief when the Canucks released a video of the Ben Hutton mic’d up for that game. If anyone could bring cheer to that depressing spectacle, it’s the relentlessly sunny Hutton, who seems to have a permanent smile plastered to his face.

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Sure enough, there are some great uplifting moments in the video, including from Erik Gudbranson, giving Ryan Miller a nice big hug before the game. Hutton chats with a young fan at the bench, then encourages the shy young hockey player lined up alongside him to wave as his name is announced as part of the “starting lineup.”

He shouts random encouragement to his teammates, bobs his head to the music during one break in the action, and confirms that the Canucks still call Alex Edler “Eagle.” Then they smartly end the video after Sutter’s goal, showing Troy Stecher saying “F*** yeah!” straight into the camera. It’s great.

But it’s all overshadowed by one utterly mystifying moment at the beginning of the video.

Just what is going on between Hutton and Granlund? Instead of the usual fistbumps before the game, they bust out what I can only call a finger bump, which sounds wrong and dirty.

Let's bust out the ol' Gif Machine 3000 to highlight the moment:


Is this why the Canucks lost the game? Is it because Hutton and Granlund did not get sufficiently pumped up before the game with a proper fist bump?

Yes. Yes it is.

The move bears some resemblance to ET healing Elliott with his magical glowing finger. Of course, since Hutton is wearing gloves, we can’t tell if his finger is glowing, so we have to assume that it is. Is this why Hutton has been having a sub-par season? Is he sharing some of his life-force with Granlund before each game?

Definitely.

As evidence, notice that Granlund scored one of the lone goals during this game and, with that goal, doubled his totals from last season with the Canucks. Are we supposed to imagine that Granlund just magically became a better player this season, while Hutton got worse?

The one flaw in my theory—the only flaw—is that this move was too well-practiced to have been done only before the Rangers game. I can only assume they’ve been finger bumping all season, so it can’t be solely to blame for the blowout loss. But it could be to blame for all of their losses.

For the good of the team, Hutton and Granlund must immediately stop finger bumping and fist bump like proper bros.

Or maybe I’m reading too much into this. Maybe it’s just a tribute to Kuzzik from the underrated “Role Models,” and they just cut out the part where Hutton says, “Let us gingerly touch our tips!” If so, that’s completely fair. The world needs more references to the work of Joe Lo Truglio.
 

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